Women And Wives Video, Cliff Richard, Marie Louisa Wain

A long sleep, close to 12 hours and many vivid dreams. I was watching a film, a dark and grainy black and white film in a square spiral-stair tower of concrete, something like an M. C. Escher print with a spattering of Ingmar Bergman. A group were ascending but it got darker and scarier, until it became near pitch black. They seemed to sense that they were ascending to hell, a place behind a distant door at the 'top'. They retreated and things grew lighter, but oddly, descent started to make things darker again after a certain point.

In another part of the dream I was shown a painting by ancient Blue Peter presenter Peter Purves, telling a friend that I knew he was a painter, and rather good, that I met him at an art group hosted by John Craven which I'd attended once or twice.

I awoke feeling slow and still somewhat tired. My throat is a little sore and dry, the October disease, this rawness which hits my throat and ears, upper chest when the days turn cold. I'd be tempted to think it was due to the dryness of central heating if we had any heating here, but it seems to be endemic.

I started work on the 'Women and Wives' video. My plan was to create animated masks to reveal the filmed components, then add a top layer of additive glow effects. This went to plan, a square pulses with the drum beat, this done by saving out a list of all of the frame numbers with a drum hit (exporting this list is a feature of Prometheus) then importing this as a list of Set Modulator events in Argus, each triggering the attachment of a modulator to the square's size. The same shape was duplicated in the glow track with a glowing object. The square slides side to side in a sine-curve, once every 300 frames. This is almost all of the video. The rest was done in AviSynth, first adjusting the lighting of the masked (revealed) parts, then inverting the mask and showing a dark grey outline of the video. For some reason, this plan was instant in my head before filming even began and it looked largely as planned.

So, this is complete. I have 'Smile to Fall' to do tomorrow.

I've been watching a Cliff Richard concert on television. He hasn't been 'cool' since the early 1960s, yet he's the epitome of a star and a brilliant singer. What is 'cool'? He is perhaps too nice, too passive, too smiley and subordinate for cruel society. Cruel society looks down on nice people; perhaps the element of 'nice' is designed to be looked down on, we smile and surrender, but what is polite or kind is oddly usurped, others leap upon the kind as 'weak' - an easy step up the ladder of hierarchy. We can tread on kind people for free, so despite their niceness, kindness, they are not seen as ideal citizens; unworthy because they paint themselves as such. When we are treated badly we want kindness, but when we are not, we want a degree of cruelty... a challenge which we can rise up to. So, perhaps Cliff is too nice to be cool again, and was cool only when rebellious. It was all down hill after ground-breaking rock song 'Move It'. Yet, star to the core he is. He can't escape his personality, nor can any of us. I loved his humour when he was jokingly mocked by Kenny Everett. Like any true artist, I hope he can and will keep going forever.

Last night I started to write a short song about Marie Louisa Wain, the sister of Louis who died in an asylum. I wonder if I can finish such a thing. If I manage it, it may be the only thing poor Marie has ever been given.

Women And Wives Videos and More Nightfood

Sigh, a couple of long days of hard work, to match the lifetime of similar long and hard days in isolation, poverty, and obscurity. Yesterday Deb came to film me for 'Women and Wives' and 'Smile to Fall', the single is out on Friday so I'd like a video. In these days of AI, which I largely hate and distrust, I think it's more important than ever to be 'real', to reject anything too digital or fake looking, so I thought that a plain filmed video of myself should be the core of both films. Deborah is a natural camera operator and photographer, she has a good eye.

I'll use Argus to mask and add top layers this week. Nightfood II is broadly mixed and complete. It's not vastly different, but the vocals are. My main job this week is to complete the Women And Wives videos.

Today was spent painstakingly rasterising the lyrics for this and the Nightfood tracks, creating them as images then making them appear in the correct places in the video using Argus. To add some interest and creativity, I've made the 'Nightfood' words yellow and shaky, anxious, matching the look of the words in the (unused) CD artwork, and the words of the 'Neon Sonata' (which I named the second half of the album) as glowing neon letters full of bounce and joy.

A new head of BBC news appointed today. Her salary is more than 200 times my income; not twice, not twenty times, but more than 200 times. How pointless I feel my life is. On my break at 3pm I saved the life of a honey bee which had fallen into the plate of water we leave out for the animals. So, to that bee, I at least made a difference.

I've started to watch the Louis Wain film again, this time with Deborah. It made me triply blessed to know and love her, and doubly blessed to have known and loved Cat. Louis Wain, Freddie Mercury, Myself, Deborah; we are cat people, we four, we happy four, we band of brothers, and sisters...

Nightfood II Vocals

Recorded all of the new vocals for the new Nightfood, so different from the first version. Rest of the day spend incorporating and mixing. The vast majority of the need for any re-takes are due to not exactly knowing the correct notes or correct words.

Nightfood II Begins

A full day working on the Nightfood remaster. First, making dubs for all new vocals. Most of the vocal tracks were mixed fine (so it seems, hard to know exactly until the final vocals are in).

Most of the day was spent remixing 'Young Attractive And Physically Fit' and the Burnout Theme, both of which were far darker and muddier than I'd mix today.

Burnout was tricky at the time. The key to mixing is often high pass, high pass, high pass! In a flat mix of infinite tracks we would have pink noise which is far too bass heavy, we want white noise, so just about everything is bass-cut (or high-boosted) to some degree. Burnout is tricky because it has a filter-sweeping constant sound, such sounds need containing, some strings, which are often constant, sometimes solo, and a piano. Pianos always need bass cutting. They tend to be sparkly in all dance tunes, but even in rock (like in most Queen songs), they're kept sparkly or tinny, above the guitars. Here I've used my Engram Firegate, a sort of 'fast duck' which monitors the piano sound and attenuates the strings and filter-sweep in proportion to the piano (and its echoes, which we also want). With only a 20% fade it makes a huge difference to the clarity of the mix without any evidence of the quieter other parts.

Young Attractive uses a similar trick on the vocoded vocal, such vocals are hard to hear at the best of times. I don't like using this effect much, the ideal is a mix which naturally makes way for every part, but it can work wonders, and the effect is ubiquitous in recorded music. It's not something I used back in ye-olde days of 2021 when I first made Nightfood. I had programmed the ancestor effect (Waterfade) by that time, then Watergate on 3 Oct 2022, which used a better formula, then the modern Firegate on 6 Oct 2024 which used normal millisec time slopes that are frequency independent. The 'water' versions used exponential multiplying gates which worked well enough but only in limited value ranges and were not quite as elegant as Firegate.

Dubs are ready, I'll need to wait until I have the time and space to sing the new parts. Can't wait!

Hello Autumn

Happy Autumn! A power day, like many October 1sts! My quarterly backups started the day, then de-clamping and varnishing the frames in progress, cutting glass and the spacer. My Toyo glass cutter has started to wain so I've ordered a new head for it. Plus, a trip out for supplies, and the announcements and promotion of the Steam Autumn Sale - all of my Steam software is taking part.

A good day overall. For me, this marks the official start of 'winter' and the start of music, writing and non-painting arts, the end of the 'summer' dominated by painting. The music jobs are already large. I need to make a video for Women And Wives, remaster and partly re-record (and notate) Nightfood and Remembrance Service, possibly create a Radioactive Soundtrack and a new Fall in Green single.

On we charge!

The Sailor Who Fell from Grace, Framing and Stains

A sleepless night of stomach problems, high blood pressure, and strange worries. I managed to dream, a strange quest which featured recounting reoccurring dreams of Arnold Schwarzenegger to a group, and being made fun of as a result! This may be related to the late night film of Mazed and Monsters, a rubbish Tom Hanks film from 1982 which is perhaps more of its time than any other 80s film, more 80s than Flashdance or Back to the Future or (the egregious) St. Elmo's Fire.

I also finished The Sailor Who Fell from Grace with the Sea, an astonishing book. In most novels you are sure who the protagonist is, the character that the author himself/herself identifies with, the one the reader roots for and sees the world through; but this is subverted here. Of the other books I've read, this reminds me most of the haunting Hangover Square. I think both books will live with me.

Framing today as planned, for 'Can There Be A Refuge From The Terror?' and 'Love And Fragility In The Age Of Perfection'. In the past this would be most of the work of framing, but now I need to cut the glass, mounts, backing board, then measure, weigh, photograph, and record, so this step of sawing, decorating, and gluing is but the first step. The black frame was distressed with a lovely new wire brush, then stained with my diluted Golden Fluid Acrylic, a superb black. The other frame used Manns solvent-based red stain, which is no longer made - alas! All water-based stains I've tried have been terrible (apart from my Golden Acrylic). Morrells stain isn't as good as Manns was, but I hope to try a Mylands solvent stain. At least some people still make solvent stains. The old Colron solvent-based stain was brilliant; their current water-based ones are simply terrible.

A full day of backups tomorrow. My second biggest of the year as 6-months since the tax-year also includes some financial tasks. A time for reflection, a micro new-year.

Art Photography, Sheet Music Publication

A good day, starting with photography of paintings: 'All The Broken Hearted' and 'All Things Bright And Beautiful'. Then more work on publishing the sheet music on itch. Basic scores (generally at least one per track) are free, and extra ones are $2 each. Some albums only, or primarily, have these 'extra' scores, like the Salomé album, which has the music in print form.

I've also added the scores for a few single releases which have B-sides, for the Woman And Wives B-side, Fear Of The Thing Itself (pending), Excessive Consumption, AI And Celebrity. All apart from All Controlled By Someone (and it's B-side 'I Can Heal').

Most of the scores are way out of date regarding standardisation of various parts, but the standardisation will continue as I work on more albums. It's much more efficient to update them all when the last album is done (2027? 2028?).

Tomorrow I'll get to framing the two unframed works I've entered into Castle Park, as their acceptance (or not) of works is very close to the delivery date. Then on Thursday a full day of quarterly backups. In other news, it seems that the Fall in Green email problems have been fixed (pending testing).

I feel overworked but I'd much rather be exhausted than bored. There's always more to do, to document, to create, to discover. Onwards!

Burn Of God Scores Finalised

A full day finalising the Burn Of God scores, developing separate piano versions etc. For the most part I aim for a 'full' version of each track, with as many interesting or complex parts as possible, plus a 'piano version' with piano and main lead vocal, a 'piano melody' version which incorporates the vocal lead into the piano melody (something fun to play, not necessarily sing), and a basic version of the lead melody and chords (and non-lyrical elements if these will fit in a single stave).

Multiply these variations up and Burn Of God breaks down into 49 scores. Each album now seems to have more and more scores, but the crucial one is that 'full' one. I suspect that I'd get annoyed revisiting older scores and their few instruments, but I tended to aim for the full one and it's easy to make the lesser scores from that. This (and the final proofing and pdf conversion) is what I've done today.

There are a few single releases that have sheet music that is either unpublished (like 'Excessive Consumption Has Laxative Effects' and its B-side 'What Has Happened To My Dreams') or not notated at all yet (like 'The Games Played As Children, the B-side to 'Masculinity Two').

It's something of a mad obsession to work on these scores, but hopefully not quite the waste as the time and money that my father expended on his stamp collection or gambling, many thousands, probably tens of thousands, of pounds over the years. There are slight practical advantages to having the scores; there's no way I or anyone could perform this music live without them. It does help me learn the skills of music reading and writing, and it should add some layer of archival security to the music itself, especially if and when published in print. And, of course, it's the correct thing to do. From the dawn of records all music has had the sheet music published, and I must do this too if I am to act in a professional way. A week per album is not a vast amount. The time and work spent on an album makes each one a greater artwork.

Tomorrow, art photography.