Tuesday, June 16, 2020

Pause

A painful night, it felt like imps were kicking me in the head with each throb of heartbeat. My ear remained blocked, yet was less blocked yesterday, it seemed that the warm olive oil caused more problems than it solved, when last night it certainly helped. I dreamt of Abba, clothed in long white fur trimmed coats, being chased through a snowy forest, like Narnia's, by two men of horse back. It was some sort of narrative or film rather than reality. They decided to kill Anna Frid with throwing knives, to make it more interesting.

No pain today but my ear completely blocked. I had hoped that this would last a day or two but it seems it will take the week, so I'll stop work on music production and make alternative plans.

Today is the first day of the Steam Games Fest, which officially starts at 6pm and features Taskforce, the first time I've tried any such thing. I feel increasingly disconnected with everything in the world, but reminded that I often have been. The busy times, generally performing or organising often feel too much too, and at such times I pray for time alone to purely create. These few months have been such rarities for that, so precious.

Hayfever is especially bad at the moment for some unknown reason, so I'm trapped inside. I'll use this ear-hayfever break to step back, analyse, plan. I dislike pausing, I'll try to keep it brief.